I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Randomize