So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
