I want to make a zoo with you.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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