Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Congratulations! We have a period
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize