you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
