So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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