we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
