i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize