At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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