Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Randomize
