Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
God, I missed his penis.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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