and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize