Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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