If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
