We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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