The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Randomize
