I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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