okay pat passed out under dana's car
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
