You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
