so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
