happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
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