There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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