I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
