We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
