Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize