Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize