They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
