Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
