I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
