God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
