He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
