Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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