So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
how drunk are you?
Several
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
