I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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