My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
