What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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