He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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