girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
