Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Randomize
