Me too!
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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