Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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