K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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