Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
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