have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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