Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
