I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
