One girl and one boy is just not enough.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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