Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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