ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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