All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
This is the high leading the old right now
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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