About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
It was confusing and full of hummus
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
