oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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